Beep Beep,

My name is Grace McCain, but you are only here because you already know that.

I am a born-and-fled Oklahoma gal with a flimsy grasp on the form and function of the written word. I now reside in Colorado like everybody else of my complexion and temperament.

You may already know my work from my years spent arguing with other people in the LGBT community about basic facts. However, my portfolio contains multitudes. My professional background is in copywriting for ad campaigns. Academically, I have a bachelorette’s degree in books, but I earn my money these days by giving simple instructions to functionally illiterate adults. In my personal life, I have written love letters of exceptional quality which made my previous romantic partners rave on and on despite them only pretending to have read the letters.

If you see me out and about in public settings, please only do one of two acceptable greetings:

In conclusion, my favorite style of comedy is one where the joke is on the audience. It sure is clever and all to exceed expectations. But ducking underneath expectations? That is where true quality lives.

For example, how dare you click on an About page and expect to learn anything of merit! I hope you have now learned an important lesson from all of this nonsense.